


dissipated

by stupidity



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: 2015 - Freeform, Angst, Confrontations, Dialogue-Only, Love Confessions, M/M, Name-Calling, No Romance, Panic Attacks, Zayn leaving the band, triggering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-22
Updated: 2017-03-22
Packaged: 2018-10-09 05:19:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10404813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stupidity/pseuds/stupidity
Summary: Everything comes tumbling down when Zayn decides to leave the band.or: a tiny fic where everything happens on a higher platform of angst.no offense to anybody, kay?





	

**DISSIPATED- One Shot**

 

**Scene 1**

**[March 11, Louis and Harry in their room, Liam packing for Bangkok, Niall and Zayn idly roaming the corridor, Post-concert 11:44 PM]**

 

 

  
**NIALL:** _(uneasy, stopping in front of his room)_ "'M not really feeling well, Zayn. I think I'm goin' t'lay down for a while."

 

  **ZAYN:** _(looks down, sighs)_ "Just say it. You hate me."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(eyes widen, vigorous shaking head)_ "No, of course, not, I don' hate ya. I just..."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "You don't approve."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(looks down)_ "Yeah, I don't approve."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "But. Niall. I'll be happy, why can't you accept that? I haven't been, and I finally will."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(gritting teeth, minutely angry)_ "You're happiness is exactly what I kept in mind, or else I would...I would-"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(whispers)_ "Kill me."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(abruptly cooling down)_ "Yeah. I would kill you."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(smiling ruefully)_ "Even though this isn't what I expected from you all, thanks Niall. Even if this a meagre amount of support, it's something I need."

 

  
**NIALL:** "Look, the lads will come around. It'll take some time."

 

  
**ZAYN _:_** _(shaking head)_ "I doubt that. I feel like I ruined everything for my satisfaction. I killed the love they had for me, and I know they won't treat me the usual. Probably they'll see me like a mistake. Because I made one. I made a hole in something that they were trying to make perfect. I'll break the fan-base. I'll make people hate us..."

 

  
**NIALL:** "You need to cool down, Zayn. I get it, they-"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "You don't Niall! That's what! None of them have even come near me from the time I told them. The first person I told was Harry, you know. I called him and I was crying. I told him everything over the phone, and he listened through everything. Everything. And he didn't say a word. After I was done rambling, he just cut the call without a reply. How am I supposed to feel on that? If he's feeling that way, how should I when I'm the one letting go?"

 

  
**NIALL:** "Because you don't have to let go! Because none of us want you to!" ( _Zayn is unconvinced)_ "You remember when we pranked him? Three years ago? He thought it was a bloody joke when we told him you were leaving. And, nobody ever thought it'd turn real."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Fine, then. If you think Harry's an exception to all this. What about Louis? He hasn't come out his room at all. He hasn't look me in the eye since and hasn't even screamed at me. I'll take anything but silence, and that's exactly what Louis wants to aim for." ( _gulps hard_ ) "And Liam. He..."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(narrows eyes)_ "So this is about Liam, then?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(widens eyes)_ "No. No." (look of disbelief on Niall's face) "It's not like that. No more."

 

  
**NIALL:** "You don't- not anymore?"

 

  
**ZAYN** : _(avoids gaze)_ "No."

 

  
**NIALL:** "I'd like the truth, please."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "I'm saying the truth. It's not like that."

 

  
**NIALL:** ( _forces Zayn's chin to him to look, stern)_ "Don' lie t' me, Zayn. I don' like it."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "I'm not. I swear, I convinced myself that-"

 

  
**NIALL** : _(scoff)_ "You convinced yourself? Really? You just lied to me and yourself. You blatantly aren't over it, and it's obvious. Everybody has a weak point, Zayn. Even the brooding, mysterious you."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(angry)_ "What the hell do you want me to do, then? Get closure?"

 

  
**NIALL:** "That's exactly what I'm suggesting."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(caught off-guard)_ "So I should..." ( _goes silent, thinks_ ) "Talk to him."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(steps forward)_ "No, that's not what I meant."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(walking towards Liam's room_ ) "You actually gave me a piece of good advice for one, Horan. You should be thankful for a brain like that."

 

  
**NIALL:** ( _furrows eyebrows_ ) "That's not what I meant, Zayn. Don't jump to conclusions."

 

  
**ZAYN:** ( _shrugs, continues_ _walking_ ) "I have nothing more to lose, Niall. I'm leaving anyways, and it'll be the last time I'll be able to talk, to express what I've bottled up. I can tell him."

 

  
**NIALL:** "You're taking left and right decisions carelessly! Think about it...you shouldn't risk it, he's already angry and don't pressurize him even more."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(stops a few steps away from Liam's room)_ "The only one pressurized here is me, cut me some slack, will you?"

 

  
**NIALL:** _(remembering_ ) "Actually, I'm coming with you, I left my phone in his room."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(rolls eyes, reaches into Niall's pocket, pulls a mobile out_ ) "What's this, then? Go back to your room, Niall."

 

  
**NIALL:** "It's an iPhone, idiot, I'm not leavin' it around."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Stop, just go." _(walks away)_  


 

  
**NIALL:** _(mutters)_ "I dunno, man. My phone's on auto-accept, and I'll be listenin' to every word you say."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(knocks on door)_ "Liam?"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(inside, doesn't look up from suitcase, rummaging through clothes)_ "Come in!"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(sheepishly comes in, Liam looks up, realizing it's Zayn, darts back to his clothes)_ "Hey?"

 

  
**LIAM** : _(feigning innocence)_ "Do I know you?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** ( _exhales sharply)_ "Liam."

 

  
**LIAM:** "Yes?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(ignores a cell-phone ringing in background)_ "Can we please talk?"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(still not looking up)_ "I don't know, should we? Do you think we'd talk proper? Do you even think we're in a state to talk without shouting our heads off?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "I know I'm not going to shout, I'm not sure if you will."

 

  
**LIAM** : _(flips around, voice trembling)_ "You're not sure if I will? No, do I look like I'll sit here and bear your crap?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(crestfallen)_ "Liam, I'm sorry."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(sardonic)_ "Oh you're sorry? You're sorry! Why can't I believe that? Out of all the lies that flowed out of your mouth, how am I supposed to distinguish what is earnest and what isn't? Huh?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "You're getting worked up for no reason, man."

 

  
**LIAM:** "No reason? From all what's happening today, from all the bombs that have dropped and all the lies that have been said, the only person around here doing things with no reason, is you!"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(snaps)_ "You're going to blow up on me like the rest of them, just because I'm leaving the band?"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(flaring)_ "Yes, I'm going to blow up on you and I have every reason to. And, just leaving the band? Just?" _(pauses to inhale heavily)_ "You have no idea how angry I am with you! You think we can handle such news just before the last show you're going to do? You're a puppet to them, they're controlling you! You're doing everything they tell you to! Every darn thing has been set up and, God-"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(looks like he wants to slap Liam)_ "This was not set up! I chose this! It was my decision! I wanted to quit! You don't know me!"

 

  
**LIAM:** "Who made it that way, huh? Who was the person who hid from everyone? Who was the one who was scared to face their demons? You were the one who didn't want to open up!"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(struck by this words)_ "No...no." _(sobs dryly)_ "Don't. I-"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(spits)_ "You know how long it took me to get you out of that shell, Zayn? Two whole years, that's what? And, you hadn't even thought for a moment that you could trust me?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(chants)_ "No...no. No."

 

  
**LIAM:** "And, halfway there, I was so happy that I was succeeding. And, all of a sudden, you go back to the start! I didn't know what to do with so much of frustration! I tried again. And again. And again. Guess what? No matter how times I've tried in the last few years, I've failed. Look at us now, I've failed."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "No, Liam-"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(shakes his head, emotional)_ "I don't know you anymore. We're nothing but strangers. We put up a show then, and we're still continuing it. We're lying to ourselves. You're just going to walk out like the last five years didn't matter, and none of us have a say in this. And, you ask me about reason, when you yourself don't have it?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(defeated)_ "No. I'm doing this for me. Because I want to. I'll be happier this way. I haven't been happy, and I want to be. Please."

 

  
**LIAM:** "You think any of us are happy? I mean, genuinely happy? We're all struggling. But, we know that in the end, we'll have what we want. We're satisfied with what we have, are we claiming for more of it?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(snarls)_ "Niall accepted it when I said I would be happy. He actually cared."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(adamant)_ "I'm not Niall."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(careful, quivering)_ "Liam, your approval is all I need. It would mean a lot for me if I didn't move from here with ghosts of my unfinished pasts."

 

  
**LIAM: "** Then, I don't approve." _(clenches jaw)_ "Not when you'll leave us, our fans -who you claim have no gratitude towards-"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "I don't care about the fans."

 

  
**LIAM:** "Exactly. What makes you think I'll believe that you've ever loved us?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "You guys are different-"

 

  
**LIAM:** "We're not. We're the same people. The same people you're going to sell out, once you start making music with Naughty Boy."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(shocked)_ "How-"

 

  
**LIAM:** "I got to know? Things spread like fire, you know. And, apparently, making music with that cheap guy meant much more to you than your brothers."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "You don't understand-"

 

  
**LIAM:** "And I never will, so quit explaining so much. You were a puppet in their hands once your fame was born and you still will be when it dies. What next then? How will you find an excuse to quit?" _(Zayn is silent)_ "Answer me!"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(flinches, stares at Liam who's glaring at him)_ "They, they. They're going to release a random picture of me with a-another girl, so that the rumour of me cheating will trigger in me going on...on break."  

 

  
**LIAM:** "And, it'll continue into a permanent one." _(Zayn nods)_ "And how will they believe it?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(sighs, voice cracks)_ "They'll make it seem like I chose Perrie over my career."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(scoffs)_ "Perrie? That P.R stunt that people can tell is a fad? You're leaving for someone who'll find out is a P.R stunt all along?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(defensive)_ "Don't bring her into this."

 

  
**LIAM:** "Or what? You going to go all Loverboy over me?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(trying to cover)_ "She's not just a P.R stunt. I love her."

 

  
**LIAM:** "I don't believe you for a second."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "You don't-"

 

  
**LIAM:** "You think I don't talk to Jade anymore? She's still one of my friends and from what she tells me, Perrie seems to be very in love you, though it's not vice-versa."

 

  
**ZAYN:** ( _uneasy_ ) "Uh..."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(laughs humourlessly)_ "See, Malik. Not everyone is living happy, but they're okay with what they have. You? You seem like-"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Stop making this about me!"

 

  
**LIAM:** "This is about you!"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(speechless, gapes for a while)_ "You're right. I couldn't open up. I still can't. I'm scared as ever. I'll never be able to come out of my shell, because it'll only be disastrous. Like the way it was with you."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(wondering, calms down a little)_ "You're saying that I didn't try hard enough?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "No..."

 

  
**LIAM** : _(almost hysterical)_ "You have to stop going in circles, Zayn. I'm done with this nonsense. I don't have anymore strength for your riddles. I've been trying...I can't."

 

  
**ZAYN** : ( _miserable)_ "I'm not riddling...I just hope you'd get what I'm trying to say without making me say it."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(looks down, eyes are glassy)_ "Stop. If you have something to say, just say it. I'm fed up, I can't figure you out. I never will. I can't understand, and it's killing me. What have I done less? What have I not done for you?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(whispers)_ "You haven't fallen in love with me."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(snaps head up, eyes wide, wet to the brim)_ "What?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(clutching hair with both hands, tugging roughly)_ "I still can't say it. I can't. Please stop trying. Please. I'm over you. I'm over you."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(soft)_ "Zayn, what do you mean?" (bit louder) "Zayn."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(voice cracking, vulnerable)_ "I was never as brave or lucky as Louis. And, I payed a large price for it."

 

  
**LIAM:** "Is this...Louis? You don't-"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(firm)_ "No. Louis had everything he wanted. He-"

 

  
**LIAM:** "Don't you dare compare yourself with Louis. You had privileges he didn't have. He has Eleanor, when he wants Harry. He's given a dirty attitude, when he's nothing but nice. He's been made into something that can't take jokes, when inwardly he's sassy. So, don't compare yourselves, it's not fair. You had much more than he did, when he got things that he didn't need."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "You don't get it." _(sighs shakily)_ "He got Harry. He wanted Harry and Harry wanted him right back."

 

  
**LIAM:** ( _stunned)_ "You-you like...Harry?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "No, God, no."

 

  
**LIAM** : "You're beating about the bush."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Why can't you understand why I beat about the bush? It's something I can't even say to myself, why are you making me say it?"

 

  
**LIAM:** "You're being difficult-"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "I'm being difficult, because that's how it is. It's difficult. Even to accept it. I was scared what it would do to me. What it's still doing to me. I can't say it. But I want to get it out of my system. I want to let it go, I want to forget it."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(sucks in cheeks)_ "If you want to forget, you must say it out loud."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "It's not that easy."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(bursts)_ "There you go again! I'm not sticking around to listen to you ramble. I've done enough of that and nothing came out of it."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(getting angry)_ "If you just had a little patience-"

 

  
**LIAM:** "I don't have anymore patience!" _(grits teeth)_ "I've ran out of it! You made me run out of it! I've done so much of waiting, that I can't anymore."

 

  
**ZAYN** : _(gnarls)_ "Well, I just can't say it. When you wanna hear something, you have to wait."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(turning to clothes, his back to Zayn)_ "I don't have time to fight with you. I'm tired. I'm tired of all of this. I just want to finish packing and go to sleep. So, you can leave now, instead of wasting precious time."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Liam-"

 

  
**LIAM:** "Please get out."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Listen to me."

 

  
**LIAM:** "You've lost the opportunity to make me."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(seething, almost losing his mind, shouts)_ "I'm bloody in love with you!"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(freezes, flips around, facing Zayn with confusion)_ "What?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(soft)_ "I'm in love with you." _(pauses, eyes widen, begins to chant)_ "No. No, I'm not. I'm not anymore. That was the past, I don't love you like that anymore. You're my brother. Okay, you're my brother."

 

  
**LIAM** : _(astounded, gapes for a while)_ "What's going on? Are you drunk?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** ( _fuming, angry at himself, flickers eyes at Liam to glare)_ "Don't accuse me of being drunk. I can't bear it. I knew this would happen. I knew it. You'd detest it, you'd think it's a joke. No matter how sincere I sound, nobody want's to believe me."

 

  
**LIAM:** "No, Zayn, I-"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(looks down, pinches nails into palm)_ "I was so so scared. What did you do to me? Why me, though? Out of all the other people in this world, who could have suffered heartache, why me? What had I done? I didn't choose this. I did not choose this."

 

  
**LIAM:** "Zayn, calm down-"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Don't tell me calm down." _(exhales sharply)_ "This is wrong, so very wrong. Why me? I'm straight, why me? I'm straight."

 

  
**LIAM:** "Zayn!" _(Zayn shuts up, glancing at him)_ "Calm down. Just calm down." _(parts lips, unable to say any advice)_ "You can't just dump it on me like that. You were my best-friend, dammit. How should I digest it like that?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Were your best friend? What happened to are?"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(looks up, shakes his head in disbelief)_ "Just because you've given out a confession doesn't mean I've cut you any slack. You're still in first base, and that's where you'll always be. You aren't my best friend, not anymore. You've stopped living up to it the moment you gave yourself in."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(bottom lip quivering, gulps)_ "Okay. Okay, maybe I don't deserve your friendship. You've made that blatant. But, please don't...don't throw away what I told you. You don't know how long it took me to accept it, how long it took to say it to myself. I c-couldn't say it, I...I. If you hate me, I won't be able to forgive myself. I wouldn't say it...if it came in the cost of losing any kind of contact with you."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(sturdy tone)_ "How long? How long have you..."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(looks away, ashamed)_ "Since Danielle and you broke up. I realized I wanted to do more than just sit there and tell you it's okay. I wanted to give you the world. " _(pauses to get a glimpse of Liam's shocked face, voice more quiet)_ "If you would have let me."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(thinks for a while, quiet)_ "I would have let you."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(flustered)_ "What?"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(clears throat)_ "I would have. I would've...become yours. If it was back then, I wouldn't have said a no."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "You would?"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(trying to sound nonchalant, but has a wet voice)_ "Yeah."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "But-But, you aren't...you aren't gay."

 

  
**LIAM:** "But I would have, if it was you. Only you. I would have been an exception. If it was in exchange of you letting me in, I...yes."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "I'm too late, aren't I?"

 

  
**LIAM:** "A bit."

 

  
**ZAYN _:_** _(thinking, guilty, tone unsure)_ "Couldn't you-"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(stern)_ "That's off limits. I love Sophia. If you had- even a bit earlier."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(defeated)_ "I can't do anything now, can I?"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(shakes his head to plant a no)_ "None. You had your chances, and you could have been where she's standing now. You could. I would have given you a chance."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(guffaws)_ "Yeah, and quoting _Loved You First_ would help my ego."

 

  
**LIAM:** "What?" ( _on realization_ ) "Oh."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "It's my last straw, don't you think...I"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(ignoring his statement)_ "Why didn't you say it before? Why didn't you come to terms with it?" 

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(frustrated)_ "I couldn't be gay! It was against my religion. Baba doesn't talk to me anymore and if he would have known that I turned out to be bisexual, he would even forget that he had a son! I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I still can't."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(sneering slightly)_ "So, being gay is against religions, Zayn. You think Louis and Harry cared about Christianity when they found out they were gay? They went with it. Because it's something you can't help. You can do nothing about it."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "You don't understand. Harry and Louis were lucky. They fell in love with each other. They wanted each other right back. It wasn't the same with me." _(looks up guiltily at Liam)_ "I knew that it wouldn't be the same with me. I was to be boy who liked a girl, and that's how I convinced myself to be."

 

  
**LIAM:** "Who made it that way, huh? Nobody ever told you to label yourself, nobody even cared about your preference."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "If you haven't noticed, we have 23 million fans who fight over our sexualities."

 

  
**LIAM:** "Just because the fans matter to us, doesn't mean we change ourselves for them. You are who you are. Everything would have been easier if you had accepted that. We wouldn't have all this unnecessary drama. All these arguments, and weaknesses. I don't even know who to blame anymore. You or the way society moulded you."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "It's inevitable, all this. If it didn't happen today, it would happen tomorrow. I'll guarantee that."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(processes latter's words, after a while speaks up)_ "Say, would you kiss me if I asked you to?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(gobsmacked, eyes widen comically)_ "W-What?"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(firm tone_ ) "You heard me, would you?" _(Zayn goggles, starts to fuel his fire)_ "Show me if you're worth it or not, with this kiss, Zayn. I dare you."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(tempted, but unsure)_ "But, what about...S-Sophia?"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(almost growls)_ "Forget about her. Right now, she doesn't matter. Can you, now?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(silent for a few moments, trudges slowly towards Liam, who's slightly trembling)_ "I-" _(moves a little closer, Liam inaudibly gasps, Zayn leans in, springing lightly on his toes, breathes out)_ "Liam." _(lips are half a centimetre away, almost touching, but Zayn withdraws painfully, stepping back two strides for good measure)_ "I-I can't."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(face contorts into cruel smirk, feeling resigned on the inside)_ "That's what I thought. You can't. You never will be able to. You're proved yourself worthy, Zayn. But, I didn't expect this from you."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(confused)_ "What do you mean?"

 

  
**LIAM:** "You're too busy playing show-boy for the whole world, that you can't distinguish your real self from your fake. You're so stuck to your image that you can't even dare to kiss me behind a closed door. I knew you were a good actor, but I didn't know you were good at acting out your own life."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(crumples at Liam's remark, chokes back a sob)_ "Liam. Liam." _(sniffles)_ "You can't determine anything just because I didn't k-kiss you!"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(laughs hollowly, clenching fists)_ "It tells me a lot actually. You're not the Zayn I once knew. That guy is dead and in his place- _(gestures to Zayn)_ "Stands a deceivable doll, like a clone. Nothing but a clone, that is nothing alike apart from looks."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(tears cascade down his cheeks, doesn't bother to wipe them away)_ "I'm sorry, Li. Please, just, I'm sorry I let it get to me. I'm sorry I didn't trust you, I'm sorry I didn't come after you." _(gasps in a breath)_ "I'm sorry for who I became."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(eyes are glassy, pursing lips, wetting them)_ "Your sorrys mean nothing now. You've had a chance to better yourself and you shook it off. Because from all these years I've learnt something...if you can't trust yourself, you can't trust anyone else. You can't love yourself, you can't love others enough. That's what you are, Zayn. You can't love me, you can't love Niall or Louis or Harry."

 

  
**ZAYN:** ( _trying to reach out, Liam moves farther away)_ "No, no, no. I can. Love you. I do love you."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(disguises wail as a cough)_ "You have more rings than fingers, and sadly there's nothing more I can do about it. I can't believe I wasted five whole years trying to crack you. Five years. And it's all coming back to me, like a nightmare. I don't need you, Zayn. We don't need you if all you're going to do is mess us up than we all are."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(clamps hand over mouth to muffle cries)_ "Don't say it like that. Please-"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(runs hands over face, sighs deeply)_ "I don't care. I don't care for you anymore. You've lost all privileges for my attention. You can get the hell out of here, and do whatever the hell you want to. You're a coward." ( _Zayn falls still at the word 'coward', eyes drooping like fear is consuming him, Liam walks towards the door, swings it open, takes a step out, stops)_ "Oh, and, screw you." ( _vanishes, the door shuts)_  


 

  
**ZAYN:** _(falls to ground, bawling uncontrollably, blubbering to himself, musters strength, shouts)_ "You'll regret it, Liam! You'll regret that you said good-bye this way!"

 

 

**[Scene 2]**

**[In their room, Louis on couch scrolling through phone, Harry on bed, staring at the ceiling with his palms under his head. Both of them hear some talking from Liam's room, but ignore it, a little past twelve am]**

 

 

  
**HARRY:** ( _in a daze)_ "Lou...you not gonna sleep?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** ( _looks up, cocking an eyebrow)_ "You're the one to ask, love. It's already past your bedtime, and look at you- wide awake."

 

  
**HARRY:** "Is it tomorrow already?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** ( _laughs to himself_ ) "Yes, yes it is. Why are you asking?"

 

  
**HARRY:** "I'm dreading tomorrow."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(understands Harry's plea, tosses phone and climbs into bed beside his boyfriend, soft)_ "Harry..."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(turns to Louis)_ "I don't want tomorrow to come, Louis."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(smiles sadly, pushes hair out of Harry's eyes)_ "I don't either, Haz. But, it's here already."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(presses face to latter's neck)_ "I'm going to miss our Zayn."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(clenches jaw, slightly chiding)_ "He's not our Zayn anymore."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(chuckles humourlessly)_ "You're already kicking him out."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "I'm not. He wants to go himself."

 

  
**HARRY _:_** _(frowns)_ "Haven't you tried to convince him? To stay? Because-"

 

  
**LOUIS** : _(sighs)_ "I think that'd be fruitless, Harry. He doesn't want to listen to me, and me -having the bighead- I don't want to talk to him. I've come to the level where I'm not going to say anything to anything he does."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(pulls away from neck, to face Louis, quiet)_ "How can you think like that, Lou? He's your best-friend."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(grimaces)_ "Doesn't seem like it anymore, though. He's a changed man now, and who am I to advice or argue with him?"

 

  
**HARRY:** _(breathes out, looks down)_ "How am I supposed to be okay when I only have one concert to do with him? Only one."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(ignores Harry's words)_ "You should sleep."

 

  
**HARRY:** "I can't sleep...neither can you."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(playfully smirking)_ "Want me to distract you?"

 

  
**HARRY:** _(looks up, amused smile)_ "Cheeky."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "That I am." ( _surges forward and kisses Harry, sighing afterward)_ "Can't blame me."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(smiling against Louis' lips, mumbling)_ "I can't." _(wraps an arm around Louis' waist, pulling him closer)_  


  
**LOUIS:** _(chuckling, lips moving to Harry's jaw)_ "Look who's eager, now."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(forgotten about Zayn, laughs)_ "We have to get up early tomorrow. If we go any further, we'll be up the whole night." _(giggles when Louis noses his cheek, doesn't stop him)_ "Can't have that."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(smirking)_ "You're not stopping me though." _(sudden raise of voice against adjacent wall, connected to Liam's room, the couple jump and pull apart_ ) "What was that?"

 

  
**HARRY:** _(sits up, touches wall next to bed)_ "I thought Liam was talking to Sophia on the phone or something, why is he shouting?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(joining Harry's side, pressing ear to the wall)_ "Actually, I heard somebody else's voice a while ago. They were cursing, bloody something, I dunno. I thought I was hearing voices."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(waits for another voice, hears Liam screaming)_ "That's Liam, isn't it? He's saying something about fans, can you hear?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** "Yeah. But, why would he shouting if voice off at this time...early in the morning?"

 

  
**HARRY:** _(sits against wall, trying to find voices)"_ It's quiet again. Can you hear anything?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(frowns, shaking his head)_ "Nope. But, he shouldn't talk that loud. He probably doesn't know that the walls are thin."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(waits for a while, sits in silence, hears another voice)_ "Who's that? Louis, did you hear that? That wasn't Liam, it sounds like someone's crying."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(doesn't nod, continues listening, hears sarcastic laughter from Liam)_ "It's Liam now."

 

  
**HARRY:** "Yeah...and, it's other person. God. They're crying." _(looks scared at Louis)_ "What's going on?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(listens intently, eyes light up in recognition)_ "It's Zayn."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(flits eyes over to latter)_ "What?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(low voice)_ "It's Zayn and Liam. They're talking. It's them."

 

  
**HARRY:** "Za-Zayn's crying?" _(Louis says nothing, pursing his lips, hearing more talk on the other side)_ "Lou, we should do something. What if...What if they're hurt? What if-"

 

  
**LOUIS:** "I knew they had some sort of tension between them. They're solving it, let them. I think it's about blooming time that they talked it out. We can't go in between."

 

  
**HARRY:** ( _winces when the ragged voices come again)_ "Are you sure?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(nods, screaming is heard, mutters)_ "God." _(crying noises, the door slams shut, stares wordlessly at Harry)_ "What now?"

 

  
**HARRY:** _(begins to speak, but cut off by Zayn's shout about regret, worried)_ "We should go, Louis. We should see if they're alright."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(bites tongue, hesitant)_ "Yeah. Let's."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(rushes to the door, flinging it open, whispers)_ "Zayn? Liam?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(follows in suit, flinches when a vase breaks from the other room)_ "Jesus Christ."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(looks towards Liam's room, gasps when seeing Liam on the floor before door, blocking ears with hands as if blocking out noise)_ "Oh! Liam! Liam, are you alright?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** ( _spots Harry sitting by Liam, goggles)_ "Liam...mate? What's going on?" _(walks towards them, kneeling beside)_ "Liam, talk to me."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(shouts, cringing away from Harry's touch, pressing hands harder against ears) "_ No!" _(squeezes eyes shut_ ) "I didn't do anything wrong. I didn't, did I? I did what was right. I chose to let it stop being my weakness."

 

  
**HARRY** : _(not understanding, but trying to soothe the hair over his forehead, rubbing his back)_ "Yeah. Yes, you did the correct thing. What you did was right. Letting your weakness go, is something really brave, Liam. You're strong, you know that."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(hiccuping)_ "B-But. But, I didn't. I hurt Zayn. I wasn't supposed to. But, he hurt me. I hurt him back. I don't know. I did right. Right I did. Please."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(pulling Liam's head into his lap)_ "Yes. You defended yourself, Li. You did great, y'know. I'm proud of you."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(tense at seeing Liam that way, glancing up finding Niall running towards them from his room)_ "Niall!"

 

  
**NIALL:** _(skids, falls next to Liam, is pale in the face, mutters)_ "And, he is regretting it already."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "Niall, what-"

 

  
**NIALL:** "Liam." _(louder, clutching his hand)_ "Liam, buddy? Can yo hear me? It's me, Niall. You remembe' Niall?"

 

  
**LIAM** : _(gasping, eyes cloudy, not looking at them)_ "Niall. Niall." _(panics)_ "Zayn?"

 

  
**NIALL:** _(squeezes hand, shaking head)_ "No, no. Liam, it's me, Niall. I'm yer friend, aren't I?" _(Liam freezes, then nods)_ "Then, you have to let me help, huh? Can you feel my hand? If you can feel it, can you squeeze back?" _(Liam processes the words, squeezing back tentatively)_ "Good. Good job, Liam. I have Louis and Harry wi' me here. Louis and Harry...our friends, remember? Our good friends?"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(voice hoarse, tears trailing down the corner of his eyes)_ "Louis? Harry?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(swallows a cry)_ "Yes, Liam. It's us."

 

  
**NIALL:** "They're going to help you up, okay? We'll take you to their room and you can sleep. Sleep sound good?"

 

  
**LIAM:** ( _eyes already drooping, drowsy_ ) "Sleep."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(bits the inside of his cheek, signals to Niall)_ "That's right. Now, we'll help you stand up, eh?" _(Niall and Louis take either sides and Harry the middle from behind)_ "That's it, Liam. You got it." _(The three drag Liam into Louis and Harry's room, placing in the middle of the bed)_ "Sleep, Liam. You wanted to sleep, right?"

 

  
**LIAM:** _(breathing stutteringly)_ "I-I. Sleep. Going to sleep." _(Louis begins to walk away, Liam grasps onto his arm)_ "No. No, don't leave."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(softens, sits by Liam, patting his hand_ ) "Okay, then. I'll be here. I'll be here."

 

  
**LIAM:** _(chokes on a sob)_ "I'm scared. Scared to sleep. Then, I'll have to wake up. Scared to wake up."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(looks at Harry)_ "Sleep, Liam. I'll be here when you wake up, okay? It won't be so scary."

 

  
**LIAM:** "P-Promise?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(gulps difficultly)_ "Promise..."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(watches morosely as Liam closes his eyes, blubbering to himself, turns to Niall)_ "Has that happened before?"

 

  
**NIALL:** "No. Not once." _(pauses)_ "Harry, gimme a glass of water."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(curious, but pours water into a glass while peering over the jug to Niall who seems to be pounding on the table, places it next to him)_ "Niall, what are you doing?"

 

  
**NIALL:** _(slips a white powder into the glass of water, stirring with a spoon, turns to Louis who looks at him comically)_ "Louis, open his mouth."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(glances dubiously at glass)_ "What did you add to it?"

 

  
**NIALL:** "Open his mouth."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "I won't, not until you tell me what you put in that."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(rolls eyes, opens Liam's mouth, dripping a little of the liquid into it)_ "Do I look like an idiot? He'll have a dreamless sleep this way. I crushed two sleepin' pills."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "You didn't need to be so dramatic with it."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(ignores Louis, sits across the bed, looking at Liam, then at Harry who stands against the wall)_ "I heard both of them fight."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(glancing at Harry, who can't seem to say anyt_ _hing)_ "So did we."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(shakes head, sounding guilty)_ "No, like, I heard them through the phone. I left my phone in their room and I kept it on auto-accept. So, when I called it, I heard everythin' they said." _(takes a shaky breath)_ "Not something you want to hear."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "Niall." _(more firm when Niall doesn't respond_ ) "Niall, what was happening in that room?"

 

  
**HARRY:** _(pipes up)_ "Liam was probably angry at Zayn's decision."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(tense)_ "That's partially the reason."

 

  
**LOUIS** : _(growling, trying to dominate)_ "Spit it out before I force it out of you."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(wants to protest, but resists)_ "Zayn went t' Liam for closure."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(confused)_ "What the hell, Niall? Closure?"

 

  
**HARRY:** _(stands straighter, taking cue to leave)_ "Actually, we've taken care of Liam, but I think I heard a vase crash in the room, I'm going to go see if Zayn's fine." _(walks towards the door)_ "I'll talk him through it."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "Oh no, you won't. You're not going to see that bas-"

 

  
**HARRY:** _(sharp)_ "Don't make my decisions for me."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(Louis shuts up) "_ Actually, I think it's a better idea if I went, Harry. He's outta control."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(shakes his head, slips out door)_ "I'm going. Tell everything to Louis." _(stops in front of the room, knocks, soft)_ "Zayn?" _(pushes door open)_ "Zayn, are you okay?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(croaks)_ "What do you want?"

 

  
**HARRY:** _(steps in tentatively)_ "I just wanted to see if you're alright."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(sniffs)_ "I'm not, okay? I'm not alright." _(to himself)_ "And I'll never be."

 

  
**HARRY:** "Zayn.." _(sees blood on Zayn's hand)_ "Oh my God, your hand!"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Yes, that's my hand. Thank you for telling me what I already know."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(walks to cupboard, pulls out emergency first-aid kit)_ "What have you done to yourself?" _(sits next to Zayn, who backs away_ ) "You have anger-management issues, man. If you go breaking everything you see, you'll be walking on eggshells. Quite literally."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(mutters)_ "Funny coming from you. You're the one who throws things across a room when you're angry."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(takes out antiseptic and gauze)_ "Doesn't mean you follow in my footsteps."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(snatching hand away)_ "Don't touch me."

  
**HARRY:** "Don't be a child, give me your hand. You're bleeding quite heavy."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(deadpanned)_ "We're not going to sit down and make daisy chains and talk about our feelings."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(grips his wrist)_ "We aren't. The only person who wants to do that now, is you." _(When Zayn gives in, nurses wound)_ "It wasn't so hard now, was it?"

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(quiet)_ "Why are you helping me?"

 

  
**HARRY:** "Cause you're hurt, silly."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(stares at Harry till he looks up)_ "I've done nothing cause pain to you guys."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(purses lips, working on the bandage)_ "You know...there's always a way to numb pain."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Louis." _(Harry glances up, confused)_ "You numb it through Louis."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(chuckles)_ "Not everything revolves around him, but yes. He has a little credit in doing that."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "H-How is he? I mean, Louis. He hasn't said a word to me."

 

  
**HARRY:** "Because he's in pain too, Zayn. And this time, even I can't numb it."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "You're saying I made a mistake."

 

  
**HARRY:**   "Quit putting words in my mouth. I didn't mean that." _(bites tongue when Zayn curls in)_ "Look, I'm not saying what you did was right or wrong, I don't have a say in it. Your decisions are yours and who am I to argue with you." _(pauses, meeting his eye)_ "Now, I'd like an explanation to why the vase is broken and the blood on your hands."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(nonchalant)_ "I, as in Zayn, smashed the vase and fell on it. It's called a physical change, Harry. I'm sure you studied it in Year Six."  

 

  
**HARRY:** "I asked why, not how."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(trying to be casual)_ "Liam and I fought, and I was obviously frustrated."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(pointed)_ "Why?"

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(snappy)_ "Don't ask me the damned questions!"

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(cool)_ "I won't unless you answer me."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(sighs, weak)_ "Don't push me,  Harry."

 

  
**HARRY:** "I don't care how this goes. But I deserve answers and I think, at least, right now you should tell me what goes on in that daft mind of yours. It's time I get answers."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(takes shaky breath)_ "Liam was already pissed off with me and I just provoked him further. He blew, I blew."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(sickly sweet)_ "Can you be more vague?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "He hadn't said anything to me since I told you lot the news. So, I took up the initiative to go talk to him. I said a few wrong things, he said  I was hurting him." _(tears slips out of him eye)_ "He said he didn't want to try understanding me anymore. I said he shouldn't have tried at all."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(wants to object Zayn's statement, but stays mum, coaxing him on)_ "And, then?" 

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(chokes a little)_ "And then I told him that I loved him, loved him like...not how friends love each other." _(head heavy)_ "I don't understand why it had to happen. Because I didn't ask for this, I didn't want this to happen."

 

  
**HARRY:** _(soft, convincing)_ "You never choose things, Zayn. It happens when and who you least expect it to be ."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "I'm not here to get preached by you, Saint Styles. Let me wallow in self pity for a while." _(Harry goes silent)_ "I shouldn't have told him. I ruined it. I ruined what was already badly ruined."

 

  
**HARRY:** "I'm not going to deny that. But, you were bound to talk to him about it, one time or the other. And you did it now, and I'm somewhat proud of you."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(lights up, but tries to be subtle)_ "Really?"

 

  
**HARRY:** "Yeah, even though I'm angry."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Harry, we've been over this. I'm leaving because I- _(cut off when the door bangs open, revealing a seething Louis, mutters_ ) "What?"

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(wild eyed_ )"You ungrateful imbecile!"

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(jumps up)_ "Louis, calm down."

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(ignoring Harry, watching Zayn poisonously)_ "What have we done to you? Why are you doing this?  Why do you want to cause such havoc?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Louis, I-"

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(shouting)_ "Shut up!" _(still flaring with anger)_ "What did he do to you?"

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Who? What-"

 

  
**NIALL:** _(running into the room, eyes wide at the both, glancing worriedly at Harry_ ) "Louis, you're causing a commotion."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "Don't tell me you're okay with what he did, Niall. Did you see him? He's not even guilty."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "What did I do?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** "What did you do?  _(laughs sarcastically)_ "He's asking me what he did? Why don't you put that brain of yours to work and figure it out. It'll probably take you a billion years, but you can at least try."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(warning)_ "Louis."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(equally angry, stands up)_ "What's your problem? You just barge in here and scream your lungs out at me. I didn't do anything! What are you busting out at me for?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** "Never...never have I ever seen Liam that way. He's the strongest of us all, and look what you've done. You've made him weak. You've made him weak, when that's what he feared the most."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(gaping, anger still present)_ "Liam? What happened to him? Did I-"

 

  
**LOUIS:** "Of course, you did something, you git!" _(pauses to inhale)_ "You know how we found him? In the state we found him? Thrashing on the ground, begging ."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(whispers, horrified)_ "Liam."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "He wasn't conscious, screaming to get away from you. I've never seen him like that, and you made him go like that. Out of his mind." _(gulps)_ "And to watch him and not being able to do anything...just."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(steady on feet)_ "I need to see him." _(strides forward)_ "I want to see if he's okay."

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(blocking his way)_ "I won't let you. You don't deserve it. You're not seeing him, you don't deserve to."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(snarling)_ "Get out of the way, you wimp!"

 

  
**NIALL:**   _(pushing Zayn back)_ "Zayn, calm down. You both need to talk it out."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(roaring)_ "Take his side, I don't care! Just get out of the bleeding way!"

 

  
**NIALL:** "You already messed up with Liam, don't repeat it!"

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(furiously  pushing Niall away, he falls back)_ "Don't choose what I want!"

 

  
**NIALL:**   _(from the ground)_ "You did the same with Liam. You chose for him."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(not understanding, attacking Louis)_ "Get out of my way before I hurt you."

 

  
**LOUIS** :  _(sneering, in Zayn's face)"_ Hurt me, then. I dare you. You've already done hurting Liam. Hurting me too won't be that hard of a task."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(struggling)_ "Just- move-"

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(in shock, comes back to senses, getting in Zayn's way)_ "Zayn, it's not a good idea, after what you told me, neither of you are stable to see each other."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Don't tell me what to do!"

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(angry, harsh grip on Zayn's arm)_ "Just because you're leaving us doesn't mean you're going to give us this crap and we're going to bear it. You're not thinking straight. You don't know what you've done, so open for one.

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(seething)_ "You were supposed to be on my side. You know the story, you're supposed to side me. Yet, you go and take-" _(gesturing to Louis crudely)_ -his side."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(glaring at him, nostrils flaring)_ "I don't take sides, unless I know which one is right. And, here, all I see is that you're wrong. You're not in your mind, you're acting out of it. I'm not going to let you see my brother this way."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(backs away, glowering poisonously)_ "I get it, you're taking his side." _(clenches fist)_ "You're his slut, you will take his side, I understand."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(eyes widen when Harry stiffens in his place, jumps up, running to Louis)_ "Zayn!" _(holds back Louis when he tries to strangle Zayn)_ "Louis, calm down."

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(roaring, struggling in Niall's arms)_ "Niall, let me go! Let me give this blasting fu-"

 

  
**NIALL:**   _(watches Harry leave wordlessly)_ "Harry!" _(flipping to Louis)_ "This is not important. He's not worth it."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(challenging, wild eyed)_ "Come at me, then. Show me what you got."

 

  
**NIALL:** "Stop provoking him!" _(whispers in Louis' ear)_ "Listen, he doesn't matter. Harry's gone. Go afte' him. Harry's more important, okay? He needs you now. So, cool down and go see him. Talk to him, 'kay?"

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(relaxes a little, Niall's grip becomes loose)_ "Harry, right. I should go." _(turns to Zayn)_ "You've shown your true colours and I'm glad you did. It saved me so much of post-ache. You knew that word triggered Harry, and what friend uses it against them? Because you're not our friend anymore. You're someone different who chooses a cheapo over us." _(sighs, walks to door)_ "Goodbye, stranger."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(watches Louis walk out, suddenly aware of what happened, guilty)_ "I-I"

 

  
**NIALL:**   _(shakes head)_ "That was low, Zayn, even for you." _(follows Louis out)_  


 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(disgusted)_ "Why do I do this? Why do I have to mess things up so much?" 

 

**[Scene 3]**

  
**[Louis walks into their room to find Harry sitting by Liam, talking to the sleeping man]**   

 

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(soft)_ "Haz..." _(Harry doesn't answer, walks closer)_  "Are you okay?"

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(doesn't look up, dry_ )"'M fine."

 

  
**LOUIS:** ( _sits by Liam's leg, tentatively grasping Harry's arm)_ "Harry."

 

  
**HARRY:** "I said I'm fine, Louis."

 

  
**LOUIS:**   "Don't care about what he said, doesn't matter. As long as you know who you are, it doesn't matter about what other people think."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(biting cheek)_ "But, Zayn..."

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(grits teeth, hasty)_ "The rule applies for him too."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(quiet)_ "The rule doesn't apply to you, though." _(looks up at Louis, insecure_ ) "I am a good person, aren't I?"

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(eyes him fondly)_ "The best."

 

  
**HARRY:** "But-"

 

  
**LOUIS** : "But nothing, Harry. I haven't seen anyone as angelic as you...You smile at strangers, you thank people even when you don't have to, you give free food out, you even tripped over a dog and said sorry to it! Is there any greater reason than that?"

 

  
**HARRY:** _(bites lip, still looking at Louis)_ "Louis..."

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(pats space next to him)_ "Come here."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(hesitantly sits there, wrapping his arms around Louis' neck, voice a little above whisper)_ "Thanks, Lou. I think I needed that."

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(squeezes Harry)_ "I'm right here, babe. Always."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(smiling)_ "I know."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(peeks in)_ "Safe to come in?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(pulls away)_ "Yeah." _(to Harry)_ "You want to sleep? It's late, Harry, you haven't even blinked a little." _(turning to Niall)_ "You have anymore of those sleeping pills?"

 

  
**NIALL:** _(occupies Harry's old place next to Liam, takes a bottle out of his pants)_ "Yeah, here."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(Louis takes bottle)_ "I don't want to." 

 

  
**LOUIS:** ( _retrieves a glass of water, holds out a pill) "_ Too bad, you don't have a choice."

 

  
**HARRY:**   _(dubiously swallows pill, frowning as Louis takes seat on the adjacent couch)_ "Where am I supposed to lay, then?" _(Louis pats his lap, Harry puts his head there sighing, staring at ceiling_ ) "I can't sleep."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "You haven't even tried, give sleep a chance. This okay?" _(strokes Harry's hair until his breathing evens out, turns to Niall, tired)_ "So?"

 

  
**NIALL:**   _(goggles at Louis, doesn't know what to say)_ "I don' know."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "What do you think...will happen now?"

 

  
**NIALL:** "I don' know."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "How do you feel about this?"

 

  
**NIALL:**   _(sighs)_ "I don' know."

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(almost snaps_ ) "Say something other than 'I don't know', please." _(Niall doesn't say anything)_ "You need to open your mouth, chap."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(slow)_ "I neve' thought it would go so overboard like this. I thought if Zayn l-left, he'd still keep in touch with us, that we'll be friends like we were even if we weren't colleagues." ( _takes a deep breath_ ) "But the way he said he didn't have anythin' to lose 'n' all. He had everythin' t'lose but he didn'' think about us."

 

  
**LOUIS:** ( _laughs humourlessly)_ "You know what's funny?" _(Niall is silent)_ "The fact that only a few months ago we all sat and wrote _Spaces_ together. The irony, I swear."

 

  
**NIALL:**   _(confused)_ "What do you mean?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** "You remember who came up with the last line to the chorus? _Who's going to be the first to say good-bye?_ It was him, and thing is that, he knew. He knew this was going to happen. And. it's seems like he wrote to mock us."

 

  
**NIALL:** "I thought it was spontaneous?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** _(smiling sadly, smoothing hair off Harry's forehead)_ "My naïve Niall...It was being planned since last year. He didn't come to places with us, it was always the four of us and he'd constantly hang out with Naughty-Boy,  I should've seen it coming."

 

  
**NIALL:** "Doesn't change anything now, it's over."

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(quiet)_ "I've see you've given up. I think I have too."

 

  
**NIALL:**   _(silent for a while, pipes up)_ "Was Harry, was he okay when you came back?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** "Yeah...he started doubting himself again." ( _pauses)_ "I didn't think Zayn would do that. He and Harry have the healthiest friendship and look how that turned into. I don't know whether to blame Zayn or not. It's like he's kept it all inside and burst out in the wrong way."

 

  
**NIALL:**   _(forlorn)_ "All of us have tried to get him to talk before and didn't work. Now that he does, we can't take it. I don't-don't know anymore." _(long silence)_ "If only we could have..." _(interrupted by a knock on the door)_  


 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(peeks in, eyes red, expression sullen and guilty, hesitantly entering, hoarse)_ "Is anyone there?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** ( _anger flashing in his eyes, gritting teeth_ ) "Get. Out."

 

  
**ZAYN:** ( _pleading_ ) "I won't do anything, please, let me just."

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(louder)_ "I said, get the hell out."

 

  
**NIALL:** _(warning, glancing at Liam, then Harry_ ) "Louis."

 

  
**LOUIS:** ( _looks at Harry as he shifts, then back up_ ) "You don't belong here, kindly screw off."

 

  
**ZAYN:** "Please, Lou."

 

  
**LOUIS:**   _(sharp)_ "Don't call me that, only people who care call me that."

 

  
**NIALL:** "Louis, you're being a little too harsh, now."

 

  
**LOUIS:** ( _sarcastic)_ "So, you want me to congratulate him on this?"

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(wiping a stray tear_ ) "Let me just see him, I'll leave. I won't bother you again."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "I told you and I'll tell you again. You don't deserve it."

 

  
**NIALL:** ( _looking at Louis, concerned)_ "I don't think that's too much to ask for." _(Louis begins to protest_ ) "Be fair, will you? It's not like we're leaving Liam with him, we'll be right here."

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(timidly walks to Liam's side and sits down when Louis doesn't object, whispers)_ "Have I done what they said I did?" _(touches his cheek)_ "I'm sorry. I'm so stupid, you know. I should have thought before I blurted everything out, shouldn't I?"

 

  
**LOUIS:** "Don't touch him-"

 

  
**NIALL:** "Louis."

 

  
**ZAYN:** _(still whispering, not listening to the other two_ ) "You know what I've realised? You've tried so much, and I didn't give you credit for it. I'm such a screw-up, but you stuck with me, Liam. If I were you, I wouldn't know what I'd do." _(pauses, choking on a sob)_ "I love you, alright? Even if I fought with you, and I'm a c-coward and you know...my soul still loves you. I can't change that. I'm sorry I'm this, I'm sorry it had to end this way. One more concert and I'm gone, Liam. I'll make sure you won't hear from me again. P-Promise."

 

  
**LOUIS:** "Are you done?"

 

  
**ZAYN:**   _(ignoring Louis_ ) "I hope you have all the things in the world, the good ones. I hope you get married one day, have children, just the way you wanted. Hope you have all the happiness, even when you're wrinkly and old and you're rocking in a creaky old chair. I can't imagine you that way, though." _(lets out a watery laugh, gets up to leave)_ "Even though I mean all this, I'm glad you're not listening." 

**Author's Note:**

> Shoulda published this two years ago. haha  
> feedback? feedback.


End file.
